I hope you took the time off to brace yourself for the second part of this date because honestly you’re going to read this with your face in your hands.
After Hercules carried me down his drive and through the front door, he did what any decent guy would do and tucked me into bed with a glass of water on the table. Of course, me being overly confident after consuming an unknown amount of alcohol, had other plans.
Completely blanking out the fact that I had just thrown up a £200 meal infront of my date, I suddenly believed I had turned into a sexy Megan Fox or something. Totally embarrassing, I know. So disobeying his attempts of politely tucking me in, I threw the covers off me and decided to strip down to my underwear. From what I can remember, at this point I’m rolling around in his bed, still believing I’m beyond attractive and I’m trying to entice him to get in with me. So. much. cringe.
The poor guy actually finally settles me down and I pretty much pass pass out until what I recall to be about 7am. He’s still not in bed and I can hear him in the kitchen talking with another girl. So many thoughts are running through my mind at this point; “how did I get here? Why do I smell of sick? where are my clothes? Who the fuck is he talking to?”
I mean, honestly, who could blame the guy for getting another girl round after his date just ate all this food, drank all this alcohol, threw up and then tried to entice him into bed?! What a nightmare. I sheepily got out of bed, put my clothes back on and took a big gulp of mouthwash in an attempt to rid the smell and taste of sick. I appeared from his bedroom door very embarrassed, thoroughly swallowing my pride. He greats me with “oh you decided to join us. Welcome back to earth”.
*que face palm.
Turns out the girl was in fact his best mates girl. The best mate was also fast asleep in the spare bedroom so we made a right pair. Shortly after, we got back into bed together, cuddled and fell asleep in each others arms. No naughty business.
As far as first first dates go, this will probably be one of the most memorable ones. I mean how can you forget being sick on the first date for f*cks sake. Apart from that, the date was something I hadn’t experienced in a long time: exciting. It’s quite sad to think that due to my lack of wining and dining towards the end of my relationship, being taken out for one meal and being looked after was something so fresh for me. At least it means I get to appreciate things a lot more.
And you know, maybe that’s a good thing.
Until next time.